Friday, October 19, 2012

Anxiety.

I have gone back and forth with myself (let me tell you there is nothing worse than fighting with yourself) regarding moving. I don’t care for my apartment that I have lived in for the past year and a half but every time I start to look at moving, I get anxiety. Let me explain:

1. I don’t want to sign a lease.

I am not sure how long I will be in Los Angeles, at my job, and all that fun stuff. Therefore, I hate committing to live in a place that I am not definite I will live there.

2. Living in LA it is hard to decide where you can live.

Unlike most cities where you can find something online, go check it out, and move in, here in LA, you have to know about crime and parking, and roaches (yes roaches). Growing up I never saw a roach. In fact, we were taught that if you had roaches, you were dirty. Here in LA, they are a free roommate. Don’t worry if you only wanted to live alone, they bring their family members by the masses and put up camp. Also, I just asked a friend about an area and his response was, “lots of Asians and lots of drugs.” I am not racist but those two combined, makes me weary.

3. 5 miles could be over an hour.

You have to consider where you are driving and what time because there could be a lot of factors that come in to play when you are driving to and from work during peak hours.

My main problem really is that I don’t know where I will be after the first of the year. I want to move so bad. I would like to pack up all my bags and move out of the country, truth be told, but that is harder to find a job. I would stay where I currently am, because rent is cheap and I feel safe, if it wasn’t for the roaches I have to keep dealing with. Then again, I don’t want to pay $2,000 a month and perhaps roaches just come with the territory. I am normally so good with decisions, I just feel like a lot is up in the air with my life and this makes me quite uncomfortable. I am a planner. I like to know things. The unknown is somewhat frightening and yes, this is why I am sitting here having bursts of anxiety moments on this lovely Friday morning. The good news is I look cute today :)

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