Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Absence of Compliments.

Throughout an average week many people give and receive compliments. Unfortunately society has ingrained in others that when one receives a compliment they must reciprocate with the same compliment. For example, "you look really pretty today."  "Thanks, you do too." Whether or not the person saying the reciprocating comment means it, they feel obligated to say it. A friend recently told me that he doesn't reciprocate the comment but rather gives them when he feels they are due, in turn making the compliment more meaningful.  There is a catch, because we expect to hear a compliment when one isn't automatically given, we assume the negative. 

I had a boyfriend that always complimented the way that I looked. I got ready, I walked out of the room and he'd immediately tell me how beautiful I looked. Being one that cares about style, that always made me happy. Now, when I get ready and go out and don't hear the expected, "you look pretty," I automatically assume I've got the wrong outfit on and don't look my best. The same goes with photography. If I take photos and don't hear back from the individual after delivery, I automatically assume they weren't happy with the results. 

We come from a society where things are  expected. Where less is appreciated because its not original but rather a robotic response. I began practicing that outlook, not complimenting out of obligation yet out of sincerity. Some things are hard to retrain but the genuine compliments are priceless. 

Thursday, July 18, 2013


On April 28 I tore my IT band in the Big Sur International Marathon. It was the most excruciating pain I had ever felt and wasn't quite sure when or if I would ever be able to run again. 

After an MRI and a definitive assessment of what was wrong, I was ordered to physical therapy, something I was not fond of. During those two and a half months he taught me how to retrain my muscles.

To stand different. 
To walk different. 
To build my core. 
To go without heels. 
And to strengthen my muscles all over again. 

Yesterday during our visit he released me to begin running, with baby steps. Basically, I'd be permitted to run for a minute. Walk for a minute. Run...walk. He looked at me and said, now I know you're going to do what you want to do but that's what I would advise you. 

Yes, he was correct. I wanted to go hit the streets and run 4 miles on my first day back, but I also knew I didn't want to end up regressing rather than progressing. So tonight, I was obedient ...somewhat, and ran for two blocks, then walked one, ran for two blocks, and walked one. My running stints were longer than a minute but I didn't push it hard. The fresh air, the beautiful streets (I love my new apartment and the location) such an incredible night!

I'm so excited to work my way up to really running again! 

Thursday, July 11, 2013


About a month for my grandmother passed away I took her wedding ring from her. The ring that she had worn for over 40 years was now on my hand. I wear the ring every single day. Last night while in a presidency meeting I rubbed my thumb on my ring finger and realized the ring was not there. In a frantic I searched everywhere; my car looked on the ground looked in my purse looked in my seat of my car and could not find the ring. Finally it dawned on me. I took the ring off when I was styling my hair. The relief that I had when I got home to find the ring was priceless. I went almost an entire day without realizing that the ring was gone. It made me think that perhaps sometimes we don't realize the importance of things until they're gone. 

Tuesday, July 9, 2013


My best friends tends to keep me in check when I fail to update the blog. I have been horrible, I know. Please forgive me?


Let’s see. I suppose the most excited thing that happened was a few weeks ago when I attended a funeral for a friend (hold tight… I am not morbid). So my friend’s mom died and I went to the funeral to support her. It was at a big cemetery, Forrest Lawn, and she said they were in the white chapel.  When I pulled up I saw a white chapel, parked my car and walked in. I leaned over to sign the guestbook and as I looked up I noticed that I didn’t see my friend. I walked closer toward the body and realized I was in the wrong viewing! Nothing like signing a guestbook for someone you don’t know! I finally made my way over to the other white building where my friend’s mom was and was able to sign the right guestbook.


Life has been hectic and all over the place, but I suppose that is what keeps us alive. One of my good friends is going through a divorce and that makes me sad. Her husband came home from work and decided he wanted someone he was more attracted to with bigger boobs… gee, inspiring. I know that life is hard and relationships are hard and marriage is NOT easy, but heck- really buddy? In light of all that heavy news- things have been hectic with work, both jobs, and lots of photo shoots, which means no free time for me. In the midst of all of this, I have managed to move from my lovely roach infested studio in Hollywood- to a nice big one bedroom in West Hollywood. And the best part of it all- there is parking… the small things in life.

My world... my thoughts

I can't apologize if you don't like what you read I can only apologize that you stumbled on my page.